I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
