I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
You can't motorboat a personality
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
