Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize