I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
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