Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize