Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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