Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
where does the pee come out of this thing
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
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