They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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