how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Randomize