Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
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