I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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