hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
