my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
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