Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
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