A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Randomize
