Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
