Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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