I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
