At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
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