I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Randomize
