eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
