Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
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