I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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