AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize