it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
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