I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize