I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Come share oat with me in your robe
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize
