Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
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