I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
