would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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