the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
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I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
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