He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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