so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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