Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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