I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
