Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
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