my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Randomize
