Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I need to align my fucking chakras
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize