is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
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