I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Terrible idea I love it
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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