I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
