I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
i out mim tonsoeep
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize