Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
