Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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