Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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