why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
