For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize