I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I believe in your delicious
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize