we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
