she looked like the before picture.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
