She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
